Start
with Establishing Expectations
When you assign responsibilities and household
chores to children, make sure that they are all age-appropriate. If you give
them tasks that are too burdensome according to their age then they are likely
to act out while performing them. If possible, break down these tasks into
smaller parts to make it easier for the kids.
Understand the Root Cause of the Behaviour
To
effectively deal with defiance in children, you need to find your way to its
root cause. There’s almost always a pattern in which children react and behave.
Which particular things do they not like and do not want to do? Are they
irritated when they are under pressure? Getting to the root of the problem
enables you to take appropriate steps to make your children toe the line.
Avoid
Delicate Situations
We all have our own pet peeves that annoy us and so
do children. It may be that in certain situations your child behaves more
disobediently because he finds it uncomfortable. Like, he may get defiant and
throw a fit if you ask him to clean his cupboard when he already has a lot of
homework and other extracurricular activities lined up. It’s best to avoid such
situations and go about them with patience and ease.
Compromise
is Important
It’s cold outside and your child wants to go outside
to play with his friends even though you know he might get sick. If you don’t
allow, the child will get upset. But if you do, he might get sick. So what do
you do? Arrive at a compromise. Tell your kid that he can play if he puts on an
extra layer of clothing and a warm beanie. Give in to your child’s demands
while holding your own to maintain peace.
Give
Them Options
Children like to have a say in what are doing as
this makes them feel heard and valued. This is also an excellent way to curb
defiance in them. Whenever you want them to do something, give them some
options and the freedom to choose. You want them to put out the trash? Give
them some leeway like when they can put it out, how many times a day, etc. Let
them decide.
Being the leading ICSE school in Patiala, we understand how difficult it can be for
parent to control defiant kids and hope these tips will help you.